sexta-feira, 23 de outubro de 2009
"What you can see is a false whereabouts.
What you can see there is a hollow look.
You can see me?
Repeated sadness.
...can you believe it?"

Shinobu here, after some weeks. ~
I just hadn't the time nor mood to post here. I don't really know how to describe how things are going in my mind lately, but let's see.
Also, here stays the warning that this post is going to be huge.

So, starting off.
Two weeks ago, me and some classmates (Maycow, Patrícia, Carlos, António, Gonçalo, Inês, Hed, and Maycow's friend, Marcos) went to colombo, to watch a movie. We are so lucky that when we arrived there, all the movies had already started. So, we went to funcenter until 18h and then some of us went to see "Fame", and the rest went home.
Basically, it was a good day, although I have to complain about the fact that we were walking in two groups. At the beginning, we were all together and saying stupid stuff (special detail to the most stupid thing that happened: Gonçalo trying to imitate the poses of Edward and Jacob on the poster of New Moon and doing very funny faces while doing it) , but later, geez.
However, it was extremely weird to see that on the next day, most of the relations stayed the
same, with us not speaking with each other. Oh well.

Next thing, we had to do a FQ report. I think that I kinda got the thing after doing it, but I'm still insecure since I never had done one full report before.
However, even if the report sucks, I'm happy about my partners of the group. It's me, António and Inês.
First, I'll admit it: I was afraid. I never had spoken with António, and then, all of the sudden, we had to pair up. But although he doesn't talk much with us outside the lesson, we can keep up a very good group. And besides, he studies, and he explains me the things that I don't understand. Someone *cough* Mew *cough* mentioned that due to his weight he could be my body guard (if you ever thought that I am huge, then you have to see him. He's like, 10 cms taller than me!). I think that if he ever reads this, or the message where that is said, he'll kill me. Go figure XD

Moving on to the next topic, yesterday was the meeting between the teachers, the parents' representative, and the class' representative. Since the main PR (quick way to write parents' representative) of our class couldn't go, the second PR had to go. Do you know who it is? Yes, you guessed correctly. It's my mom. The CR was Bruno, and he went, which I don't know if it makes me happy or sad.
And why, you ask?
Well, all the people that know me and my mom, know how she is. She just speaks too much for her own good, and she even says personal things of her children that nobody should ever know about.
And this time, it wasn't different.
So, she even said out there bluntly that I am "very shy and that I need weeks, if even months, to feel confortable around someone". It was fine until here, although I didn't want my "trouble" to be known.
But later, she said that "I really hated the class and school, but I've made some friends, so it's been kind of okay". I mean, she just said that I hated the class with Bruno there when he makes part of it, what the hell would you think in his place? I probably would think that the "hate" part would also apply to me ~.~
And since I don't fully know what kind of person he is, I don't know if he would spread all the things that were said there about me that nobody should know about.
At least, all the teachers said good stuff about the class generally, and my Maths teacher that hates my mom didn't reconize her. Hurray that!

I guess that's all.
I have lots of things to say, but I don't feel like it.
Lately, I've been a little down, and I am afraid to reveal it to others, and to see everybody using it against me like they did last year.
But this time, if I am in the water, and I stop swimming again, I don't think that I'll be able to save myself from drowning.
So, let's just see if I can get back up again, and stand above the crowd.

Also, special thanks to everybody that didn't change, which seems to be almost nonexistant.
It's hard, when even your best friend changes after walking with one of the persons that you currently hate most.
So, until next time...

Nbye~

Signed out while sighing,
Shinobu. ~

1 Comments:

At least you still made it to the movies and had the chance to spend some time with your classmates outside classes :P
Your relantionships will improve, give them more time to get to know each other and stuff.
And ganbatte with the reports n_n

Hah, parents. They sure talk too much when they're suppoed not to.
But maybe Bruno isn't one of those people who love to gossip.

I've been down myself but let me know if there's something i can help you with.
Senpai is always here, you know that.
YOSH! 8D

By Blogger Sara ~, at 24 de outubro de 2009 às 09:32  

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05:43

sexta-feira, 9 de outubro de 2009
Near's font rocks, and it's really addictive! 8D~


Shinobu here, going through lots of issues.
All my classmates, even the ones who seem, erm...dummies, are smarter than me. I mean, wtf? I usually knew everything, but now, it looks like I have to study. Do you know what that is to me?
Now, I'm going to be mentally disturbed, so sorry to everybody if I act like a psycho. Not having time to play games, and having to study...it will turn me into a disturbed person. I just hope that in the end, this thing is useful for anything that it is.
And, I'm not just losing my sanity. I'm algo going through some emotional troubles, not that you care about it anyway. I feel weird for starting to like somebody else, since it's only been a few months since, erm, that big trouble with that being *cough*
To help it even more...it seems that I'm known at the art half of my class as the "anti-social". What do you mean, anti-social? What happened to the "whatever gamer"? I just don't have anything to say to them, I speak a lot with Marta A., Sandra, Mariana, Tiago, Inês, Bruno, Elizabete and so on!
So, you see, I'm not anti-social at all.
Geez, all of this is pissing me off.
Also, I want to write a very pretty text, and I can't describe music (yes, this is important since it's the main theme of it).
I've always been good at describing stuff, but melodies are...really hard.

Oh well...oh well.

Well, going on to something more normal now. Today I spent the day with Cheila.
Goddammit, Pedro. She's not blond! She just did a few yellow highlights. ~.~
Still, I want to see how Joris is. They say that he also dyed all his hair. (although I also doubt it -_-)
I wonder why is painting the hair blond so in. The hair stays all ugly and weird, so what's the deal? Besides, brown is far more cute 8D~

So, that's it, folks. I'm going to sleep, 'cause I have to rest for tomorrow.
I'm starting to study, I guess.
I must say that I really support someone's (like I don't know who said it *cough*) ideia of us becoming a study group. I really wouldn't mind it, as I don't think that I'm still mentally ready to force myself to it.
Let's just see how things will go and hope for the best, geez.

Nbye! ~

Signed out while singing very badly Shake It,
Shinobu. ~

2 Comments:

Este comentário foi removido pelo autor.

By Blogger Sara ~, at 10 de outubro de 2009 às 05:49  

I must say i've never seen such a kawaii S ! :o

Your classmates aren't smarter than you, they're just probably studying already.
It's okay to act like a psycho, i totally understand what you're going through :p
It happened to me too. Your brain will realize that lazyness + high school don't match at all x)

And you don't have to feel guilty or whatever about liking someone else.
Moving on is never a bad thing i believe n_n
Also, remember artists' stereotype: they're weird. Plain and simple.
*dodges artists' flaming arrows*
Please keep this in mind Kouhai-chan:
People don't tell you who you are, you tell them.

Your friends are into changing their hair colors?
Tell them to stay away from red.
Blond is dumb. Red is freaky.
I've been there and i can tell ! xD

Ganbatte! n_n

P.S - I deleted the previous comment because i mispelled something.
Gomen! *bows*

By Blogger Sara ~, at 10 de outubro de 2009 às 05:52  

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15:53